Monday, June 6th, 2011 at 6:51 pm

Sunday shopping - Henry Fable

I have never known shopping to take so bloody long!  Early yesterday evening, me and George headed out into town, the first time any of us had been out the house.  Armed with a couple of sledge hammers, we made it to the car and headed to Lidl.

Our plan was to do Lidl, Icelands, Co-op, then Morrisons.  We left the car in the car park, leaving the doors unlocked (zombies don’t do cars, right?).  smashing through the massive front window with our sledge hammers, we climbed into the store to pilfer what we could.  The store was dark with shredded cardboard strewn across the floor.  It’s odd to think the door was locked with so little here…
After an hour of looking through the mess in the shop and in the stores, we found a few tins of steak, a mangled but sealed tin of tomatoes, and a microwave curry.

After putting our spoils into the car, we headed next door to Icelands.  We made it up the first aisle before seeing a pastey employee stumbling about, it opened its mouth as if to shout, but out came a gargling splatter of blood and God knows what other fluids.  Dropping the frozen pizza we had picked up, we ran as the monstrosity behind us seemed to get louder, we we made our way down the aisle freezer lids were throw up as more employees and past customers fought their way out, it was just like in all the films but with zero coolness, the was scary.

Back into the car we dashed to Co-op, driving around a bit to calm our nerves.  We couldn’t have gone back yet, we had tinned tomatoes and tinned steak, and not much of either…

Co-op was surprisingly empty, we didn’t see a soul, or soulless being in there!  We also only managed to pick up a packet of flour and six tins of SPAM…

We saw next  to nothing on the way to Morrisons, but as we pulled into the car park we saw what appeared to be the remains of a struggle.  Our guess is that there was a group of people trying to hold the store – a good idea when you think about it, all that food…There was blood and guts everywhere.  Rolling the window down allowed a stale, rotting smell drift in the car, the warm weather we’ve had recently probably didn’t help…
Everything was still, so we parked up right next to the store, and ventured in.  Big mistake.

The store appeared empty, of life (or, erm, lifeless?), and of fresh food.  Fruit and veg aisles were empty, as was the deli counter.  There was the odd can of prunes or pickled [insert last thing you’d want pickled here], nothing nice.
We picked what we wanted, some more powered milk, some tins of whatever, and toilet roll!  There was still toilet roll!
Being at the back of the store by now, we made our way to the exit, only to be greeted by a handful of them, laying about near the sandwich section, just out of site from us as we walked in…

As we saw them, they saw us.  It’s not that they moved particularly fast, but their reaction time was immense.  All of them (perhaps five or six) lunged forward, falling over each other.  I dashed off, looking round to see George just standing there, stunned.  I went back to grab him, the  zombies were up on their feet by this point and struggling to make proper use of their legs.

We went to run back around the store, but as we reached the other end of the tills we were greeted by more zombies.  We think we had probably disturbed them as we had walked around.
From two directions we had these things gaining on us,  hissing and gargling, gnashing and thrashing.  It was truly terrifying. We headed down an aisle to find more – where had all of these damned things come from?

We were pretty much surrounded.  It was odd because none of these things were moving quickly, but they were all around us.  We had plenty of time to think, but were too panicked to think of anything, until George said that we should head up.
So we jumped and clambered from shelf to shelf and sat ourselves atop the units.  Jumping from unit to unit, we headed for the deli counter, hoping there was still some sharp implements to throw or whatever.  Getting there was saw it was now occupied by a couple of zombies, licking at the metal plates the meat had once been placed on.

Changing direction we headed for the stores, we jumped from the shelves and through the swinging double doors, then almost immediately up onto the high shelves of the stores.  The place was pretty empty, but we found some boxes and hid ourselves on the top most shelf at the very back of the room.  We sat and waited for what felt like eternity and we saw nothing, but still we sat.

The next thing I recall is waking up.  We had both fallen asleep in these large boxes perched upon the shelf.  The ventilation had turned itself on and was blasting out the most horrid of smells, like having the air from a dustbin lorry pumped into your face.
After looking around the room, I woke George and we sheepishly ventured through a window to the back of the store.

The sun was bright, we must have been in there all night, then I looked at my phone – it was half two in the afternoon!
We made our way back to the car without further incident.  We got home OK and unloaded what little we had salvaged only to find we had left the toilet roll in Morrisons…

That was about five hours ago, we’ll have to head out again in a few days for more supplies…